*Walks to the  front of the room and into a sea of faces”

Hi, My name is Tom and I am a fat stressed out trucker…

One of the reasons I have been a bit behind on the blog as of late, in fact, is embarrassment. Embarrassed that I keep falling into old habits and keep finding the weight that I have lost. Over the last several months I have realized if I have any personal hope of getting to where I want to be I have to make some changes.

Dieting can cause stress too

Like many people, I have tried changing my diet and exercise. While I have been able to get results from it. Sooner or later I fall into old habits and that pesky weight comes back.  As I have been driving I have been doing a good deal of thinking and have realized that the changes I am making are superficial. I am trying to make major changes in my life without fixing the underlying issues.

For me personally, I have found that when I get stressed I tend to eat. Not just larger quantities of food but foods that for me don’t just provide “comfort” but actually provide good memories as well. As a kid mashed potatoes were one of my go-to foods. While it does provide fond memories of home and family there are also memories of  ” She Who Must Not Be Named for Fear of Summoning”. The same is also true of Boston Creme pie I rarely eat it anymore as it brings back less than pleasant memories. (It used to be one of my favorites.)  Things like chocolate, ice cream, and cheesecake have replaced it, as it gives good memories and improves a crummy day.

Many will say that it is the sugar in it that makes many people become addicted to foods and yes there is some interesting science that helps prove that.  Yet I think they are overlooking a key factor. When people talk about memories. There are often food or food smells associated with those memories.  Why would there be pumpkin spice everything come fall, or gingerbread and candy cane flavored treats around Christmas?  If our emotions are not tied to food and its smells.  That is why you will sometimes hear people say eating a certain food was an emotional experience or reminds them of their childhood. Also why else would Disney and other companies pump certain smells into their environment to encourage certain behaviors with their guests?

I have talked from time to time about finding motivation and keeping it on my blog. To be honest I have done a horrible job of keeping and staying motivated.  Driving thousands of miles a year gives one time to think.  What I have come to realize is that if I want to change my health I have to deal with my emotions. That when I get stressed I tend to fall easily into old habits as they are comforting.

This means I have to face a few realities one I am Fat and stressed out. Most drivers I talk to seem to have an abundance of stress in their lives, work, finances, family, regulations, and too many other things to list. Two I need to learn to deal with stress.  This could be managing it better or if needed to get rid of relationships or situations that stress me out.  After all what good is having a relationship that makes you just want to eat your weight in cheesecake? (Yes somedays I ask myself if that is really a bad thing.)

As a man and a driver, we have been encouraged to bottle up our emotions and stress. For years I had the motto. I store up my stresses for when I start getting unstressed so I  don’t run out, as one can never have too much stress. While stress can be a good thing at times. (Believe it or not, small amounts of stress are good for you.) Too much will cause health issues over time such as increased blood pressure and weight gain among other issues.

They say if you really want to make changes in your life it is good to admit to your weaknesses and find a way to hold yourself accountable. I am human just like any other driver out here on the roads. With many of the same issues, and I  work hard to get by and survive just like anyone else.  Some have called me the poster child for trucking health.  If anything I am the poster child of what NOT to do.

I fully intend to be more open and honest about my struggles and the lessons I have been learning.  So if you want to laugh, cry, shake your head in a WTF moment, or just beat my head into a wall for being thick headed and denser than a dispatcher. Sit down, shut up, and hold on its going to be an interesting journey.  Folks, there is no GPS, or Road Map just a goal of living a better life and being a better person. I hope you can avoid some of the pitfalls I have made in the past and will make in the future, or at the least get a laugh in the process.

*Hello Tom*